Rose Colored Glasses

Mike paused. I just haven't been eating alot. Mike knew he was in trouble.

"You haven't been eating at all and when you do you throw it back up. I just want to know why baby."

Mike didn't want to say so, but he was in bad shape and he didn't want to fight. You didn't want to make love to me, I disgusted you. I needed to lose weight, make myself look better for you. Mike scribbled quickly.

Alex gasped.
"No baby, not at all. You were fine! I didn't want to hurt you darling."

We have done it like that before and you didn't stop. Its because I had the babies and I gained a little weight. I was unattractive, undesirable, ugly. Mike wrote, his heart twisting in pain.

"No, don't you ever think that. It was because you were so tight, you were choking me, the only time you were that tight was our very first time and I didn't want to hurt you that bad. I could see how much pain you were in."

But you still did it our first time, you didn't stop and you did this time. Because I was not worth really wanting, you didn't want me Mike felt his eyes stinging.

"Mike baby I'll always want you." Alex cooed, caressing Mike's cheek.

But you didn't, You stopped. Mike stared at his lover sadly, it mad him want to throw up.

"Cause you were hurt honey, not because I didn't want to." Alex frowned.

It always hurts Alex, why was this time any different? Mike wanted to know so bad.

"'Cause I care about you even more now baby. We have a family now, I can't be careless and risk hurting you."

Mike turned away, he was not that fragile. Or at least he didn't think he was.

"Wait a minute, you don't get to be upset with me." Alex chuckled. "You haven't been eating. You know that could've killed you? You could've died if they didn't get you here fast enough."

Mike shrugged, he didn't have a life to love if Alex didn't want him anymore and that was all there was to it.

"Why are you acting like this is no big deal? Think of the children, of our friends, of ME. I couldn't live without you Mikey."

Because if you don't want me, I have no life to live or care-about. Mike scribbled quickly.

"But I do want you. Get that through your thick skull." Alex chuckled, ruffling Mike's hair.

Mike shrugged, it sure didn't seem like that a few weeks ago, but he couldn't argue with Alex right now, he couldn't even talk to him.

"Well, after they let you go home I am going to make you every food known to man and make sure you eat mister." Alex scolded mockingly.

Mike rolled his eyes, that wasn't going to happen, that is unless Alex decided to hit him again.

"Don't think you're gonna get away with not eating from now on. I'm gonna be a whole lot more observant."

Mike rose his hand, telling Alex to shut up. Mike glared at Alex and shook his head 'no'.

"Do you honestly think I'm going to let you stay anorexic? You're insane."

Mike nodded and then shrugged, he didn't think he could go back, he body didn't want to keep anything down.