If You're Reading This

Mike locked the door and turned the water on. He felt dirty and he was about to just shave the rest of his hair off. It was better than waking up every day and crying when he found ti on his pillow.

Alex explained to Sydney what had happened and she let him go back upstairs to check on Mike.
"Mikey you alright in there?" He called through the door.

"Im fine Alex, go back down and see your baby's and your grand baby." Mike was staring at himself in the mirror, he detested what stared back at him.

"honey you are a grown man now. You can't hide whenever i upset you like you used to."

"Im not hiding from you Riley, im going to take a bath and shave my head is that okay with you?" Mike glared at the door.

"Mike I wasn't trying to be mean. And you are hiding you locked the door. You only do that when you're mad or upset with me. So please let me in."

"Why do you need to come in? I can shower and shave by myself." Mike didn't feel like arguing, he was so tired.

"Because I'm your husband, I love you and you're sick." Alex said. "That's why."

Mike sighed. "Alex baby, i'll be out soon okay? I promise I will, I just don't want you seeing me like this."

"Baby I don't care how you look. I want to see you every second of every minute of every hour of every day of my entire life."

Mike unlocked the door and poked his now completely baled head out. "Please. I know how you are sweetheat, and I just.....I need to be alone for a minute okay?"

"no. I know you might not make it through this and until that happens I will be by your side 24/7 until I have to go back."

"Oh, and Critter is talking to the generals about that." Since Critter was one of the best generals ever he knew about rules and he was really getting on peoples cases trying to get Alex dis charged.
"Im just going to take a short bath baby, let it go."

Alex slid in the door, careful not to bump Mike and sat down on the toilet with the lid down.
"Kay, you can get your bath now." He grinned.

Mike shook his head. "I am NOT getting naked in front of you right now." Mike pointed out the door. "Go on, Ill be out soon but there is no way in hell your seeing my sick ass naked."

Alex reached over and pantsed Mike. Jeans and boxers.
"Too late." He chuckled. "Baby, there is nothing wrong with you. You look fine."

Mike quickly pulled his pants up. "Alex Riley stop it!" He was close to tears, he was serious and Alex was not helping.

"Mike please." Alex frowned. "I swear to god. You're not grossing me out or anything. You're still as sexy as always."

"Alex damnit dont lie! I have looked in the mirror, im sick I LOOK sick! Now just go." Mike pointed again to the door, tears forming in his eyes as his stomach churned painfully.

"I'm not lying Michael. The love must be blinding me because all the years we've been together you have looked exactly the same. You look like an angel Mike."

Mike swallowed thickly. "That's sweet baby, it really is but im just not...comfortable with you seeing me like this."

"i want you to always be comfortable around me. I want you to know I mean what I say and I won't be grossed out because of the way you look."

"Baby, its not you in uncomfortable with, its me. I am uncomfortable in my own skin. I just can't do this, in my mind its just......why would you want a sickly person once you see how bad it really is?" Mike sighed. "Please Alex, just go."

Alex wasn't giving in.
"You really think I'm that shallow?" He raised a brow. "You think I'm going to waste almost twenty years of love?"

"Alex baby please not now, I can't take it." He shook his head. "We can talk later just not now please go."