Can't Go On

"Memaw is back to being scared Grandpa will leave and all mom and dad do is fight." He hated it.

"Really? Damn. Sorry kiddo. So, you're stuck alone with the psycho old people?" He raised an eyebrow.

Jr said nothing.
He was all alone now when his parents fought. He either listened or hid under his bed until it stopped.

Zac frowned.
"When they're fighting gets too bad, I want you to call me. I'll be over in a flash got it? And... if they fight so much... I might have to find somewhere else for Jude..."

"Awww Zac, I can take care of him....Ill protect him good. I love him remember?" Jr grinned at him.

"Anything happens and I'm holding you responsible, squirt." He nodded.

"Okay bubba, whatever makes you feel better."
A pause.
"How is quincy?"

"He's..." He paused. "He's just being himself." He nodded and sighed.

Jr nodded not quite sure what that meant but he acted like he did anyways/

Zac smiled softly.
"It means he's upset me, by screaming and losing his temper. But thats how he is and I deal with it." He clarified

"Why do you put up with that? He sounds mean...." Jr frowned at his brother.

"He can be... when people hurt me.. I block them out. But... he's hurt me more than anyone else and I still keep letting him in." Zac sighed. "Its love, Jr. Crazy thing ain't it?"

"Does he....Mean to hurt you?" Jr cocked his head to the side curiously.

"No." Zac shook his head. "Atleast I don't think so. He does though." He nodded. But no matter how hard Zac tried to keep from being like memaw, he was. No matter what Quincy did, Zac knew he'd always take him back.

"Is he good to you bubba?" Jr curled up and sighed.

"Yes... he's... its so complicated Jr. You don't really know the feeling until you've loved someone this much.. he's the best thing to ever happen to me and the worst. He's made me cry the most but then, he's made me the happiiest I've ever been. He's hit me once and he's made love to me so many times. Its always one extreme to the other." Zac shook his head.

"But you....wouldnt change it for the world. Would you bubba?" Jr caught on fast.

"Nope. I wouldn't." Zac smiled softly.

Jr sighed.
Zac had left them all for Quincy.

Zac would give anything for Quincy... even if he had the oppurtunity to be born, to go back to a time when Sydney had never killed him, he wouldn't..

"You give too much for him...."
Jr wanted to hate him so much...
But he made Zac happy.

"That might be true but... I need him, I love him.." Zac sighed. "You'll understand someday... memaw understands too, I know he does."

"But memaw is weird like that....Does Momma know?" he cocked his head to the side again.

"I don't know... daddys never hurt momma too bad. They fight and stuff but.. i don't know if momma's really given something up for daddy." He thought back.

Jr frowned.
His parents were special too...