Better Sorry Than Safe

"Um... yeah I did... sorry." He whispered softly.

"Asher....im upset with you...." His voice was weak, not the normal hyper curious sounding voice, it was lower, still slow and drawn out....

"I-I know... I'm sorry..." He sighed softly.

"Now....we cant...be friends....And I miss you..." He sighed softly, wiping tears away. "I like you...Love...you...Its bad....So we cant talk anymore....I cant risk it....not again..." He sighed softly, the tears in his words loud and clear. "Im going to be stupid again since your not helping me...."

Asher whimpered softly.
"I miss you too... I love you too... I... you were never stupid Ary..." He sighed, rubbing his eyes.

"Hunter said I was....re-tar-ded." He sounded out, in his droning voice, "He said I was...Stupid...for being so upset...c-cuz you kissed me and I-I liked it..."

"well I tihnk Hunter is retarded..." He frowned. "You're not dumb at all Ary... "

"Then how come people act like I am?" He asked softly, curling up beside his friends on the bed. "How come Kyle left me cuz he said I was stupid...How come people make fun of me?"

"Because.... they don't really know you Ary. You may come off a bit stupid at first meeting I wont lie. But when I got to know you... I realized you're so much more than that. You're sweet... and caring and really really smart in your own way... you're great at dancing... you're... you have so many great qualities no one sees..."

"Asher...." Aristotle had gotten up and dressed, going out to the porch and sat on the cold grass.
"Wanna come watch a movie with me and go to sleep...As long as you dont kiss me?" He asked softly, leaning against a pole. Sure he said he would not call or see Asher again but all it took was talking to him for a few minutes and he had changed his mind.

"I'd love to." He nodded even though Aristotle couldn't see him through the phoen.

"Okay....im out here on the porch waiting...." He nodded, he was slow, most people wouldnt ask someone to come out at five in the morning but he was...

"I'll be right there." he nodded and hung up. He left a note for his friends, thanking them. He then headed outside. he slowly approached Aristotle's porch when he arrived, smiling softly at his friend.

Aristotle had yet to notice him, he was still crying softly, hugging a coat tight around his and clutching one of his large teddy bears.

Asher stepped up and placed a hand on his shoulder.
"Hey..." His eyes were puffy and bloodshot, his hair was a mess. He looked the worst Aristotle had ever seen him.

"Hey..." Aristotle drew in his special way, barely raising his head to look at Asher. He looked just as bad, his own hair matted and mused, sticking up in every direction and his own Hazel eyes still swimming. He made to move, just sat there in the silence.

Asher sighed heavily and sat down on the ground.
"Are you okay?"

"No.....Im not okay...." He looked down, defeated like he never was before. "Im upset...." He has said it so many times but he repeats himself, not knowing how else to make Asher understand just how upset he was...

Asher sighed.
"So am I Ary... I think I love you and... I dont know." He shook his head.

"Asher....." Aristotle looked up at him, his eyes overflowing with tears. "I heard Chord talking to Joslin 'bout you....I can't be with anyone....not since the first time a-and....you wont stay.....and I cant handle it....we cant be friends because I think I love you too...it wont work...." He shook his head slowly.

Asher swallowed, his eyes filling with tears again.
So this is what heartbreak felt like. This is what he'd done to all those boyfriends he left?
"Aristotle... you don't get it... I... I won't leave you..." He didn't know how to explain it.

"You...leave everyone Asher.....And.....Im too stupid for a lover....or anything...I tried once....He was with me for nine months....he left, because I was too retarded....and he laughed in my face. I dont wanna do it again...."
He was like Joslin in a way, but Aristotle was a virgin, he had been cheated on, and lied too, but to him he was just to stupid to know it was happening until the boy left him and told him why.

"I leave everyone because I didn't love them... I've never felt this way before... And you aren't too stupid Ary..." He sighed. "I dont mind that you're a little slow... I'm your tutor after all. I haven't given up on you yet, why would I?"

"Because....Chord says you will get bored." His face was one of total hopelessness. He would never have a lover...

"Well you know what? Chord doesn't know me at all. He can't be telling you what I will and will not do. Ary we've been talking for a month or two now and I haven't gotten bored for one split second. Thats the great thing about you. You're never boring..."