Can't Go On

Quincy didn't answer, he had left the house and climbed back into his tree.

Zac frowned and went to lay down in their bed while he waited for Quincy to come home.

Angel came in and sat down, away from Zac and watched him silently.

Zac opened an eye and looked over at him.
"Hey Angel..."

"Hi." Angel talked to no one after Brayden had hurt him....He had been so stupid to think Brayden would have been his knight in shining armor.

"Hows it goin baby?" Zac hummed at him.

"Like it always is.....shitty and slow...." He was so quiet...and he didnt wanna be in this house with these people.

Zac nodded.
"That is how it goes most of the time around here aint it?" He nodded in agreement.

Angel frowned at him.
"Sounds like you love it here with your family don't it Zac?" Angel didn't see this as his family....they were strangers...

"I do, I love em all but lately its been stressful." He nodded, stretching.

"With your other kid?" The voices were pestering him.

"Mhm." Zac nodded. He raised an eyebrow. "Voices talking?" He'd gotten to know Angel pretty well but no one was really close to him.

"They are always talking. They are laughing at you and daddy and that other kid. I dont want to be here. I want to go away....I want to make the voices go away...." Angel leaned against the wall, rubbing his temple.

"Poor baby." Zac frowned at his son. "I'm sure someday you'll find away to get them to go away..."

Angel missed Higgy and Brayden....No one else could handle him and he didnt want them too. "Sure....Im a baby...."
He had never gotten to be a baby.

"You don't admit it a lot but to me you're my baby. I love you ya know... So do Brayden and Higgy..." He was a mother, even with Angel, he just knew these things.

Angel looked at him sharply.
"Dont try and be a momma now Zac, I didnt have a mother when I needed one. When I was getting raped at the age of four. I didnt have one then and I wont have one now and Brayden and Higgy are lying bastards who can kiss my ass and fuck off." He hissed.

"If I would've known..." Zac sighed. He always wished he could've raised Angel.. been a good momma to him... "You don't think of me as your momma but I am. No matter how much you hate me I'm always gonna love you Angel.."

"Sure you will....Im sure you loved me when I was getting my ass beat every night....When I was being raped like a two bit whore....I bet you did love me huh Zac?" He never called his mother.

"I did Angel. I always have. From the moment I held your dead body as a baby. Even when I didn't know you, you were in my heart. It hurts that I never could find you. That I let my baby get hurt and raped and... awful things... and I'm sorry for that..."

"Not as sorry as me Zac."
Now he had these fucking voices in his head.....
He would never be normal.
Never be happy.

Zac hated this... it was all his fault. Why couldn't they have all lived?

Angel didn't wanna be here......
He couldnt be close to anyone...
He was better off alone.

"Angel... what happened with you, Brayden and Higgy anyways? You liked them I thought?" He never had gotten the whole story...

"Its was just....I mean....." He sighed. "I had a crush on Brayden, yes he is supposed to me my brother but I dont think of any of you as family so it didnt matter and....I like him and he liked me and after he left I was.....Not okay. You grounded him and I was alone again...I had to go to the mental institution to get help and while I was gone apparently they hooked up...." Angel seemed heart broken..........